Nearly Relevant

Nonsense, Fiction, and Miscellaneous Things

Li'l Stonehenge

Archaeologists find new structure at Stonehenge
Thu, 22 Jul 2010 09:48:30 -0400
LONDON (Reuters) - Archaeologists have discovered a wooden version of British prehistoric monument Stonehenge at the same site,. . . http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE66L17Z20100722?

A new discovery of theater-shaped artifacts has been discovered. Stonehenge, the formation which gave birth to crop circles, has now given birth to a wooden offspring, also round, like Stonehenge. The wooden version, attended to at birth by doctors of archaeology, was successfully discovered just recently. "Waaaaaaaa, waaaaaaaaa" was heard as a ground reading radar revealed the tyke. This is the first indication that Stonehenge is a female. Gestation is estimated at 4,000 years and counting.

Dr. Phillip Phelps, head of the expedition; "Good God, we weren't sure of it's location but believe me, when we heard it cry, tears welled in our eyes." The tyke weighed in at approximaely 2 1/2 tons with a diameter nearly that of it's parent. Already, Woody, as he has been named, is being attended to by numerous business entrepreneurs, scientists, and at least 4 woodpeckers. "We'd really like to isolate him from the publicity. However, this kind of celebrity isn't easy to control. As long as we can eventually pressure-treat him we'll put up with the crowds. He'll never last without pressure-treatment."

Stonehenge's purpose has never been widely agreed to. The new speculation is that propagation is definitely an element of Stonehenge's purpose and, based on this, the presumption is that Stonehenge was established by aliens as a way of populating and, eventually, controlling the earth. However, seeing as how it has taken nearly 4,000 years to give birth to just 1 wooden offspring, most scientists are convinced the aliens are some sort of space-age nincompoops.

Posted: Wednesday, July 28, 2010 with 10 comment(s).

Categories: HuMor, Nonsense,

Tags: Stonehenge, Li'l Stonehenge,

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Don Quixote

I've started reading Cervantes, Don Quixote. Published in 1605 it has been translated from the Spainish and has a definitely modern tone of humor. How much of this modernism is a result of the transaltion, I do not know.

Here are some quotes:

Don Quixote, from reading tales of knight-hood, has become bewitched by and his life has become an imitation of, these tales.
"O Dulcinea, my princess! Sovereign of this captive heart! Grievious wrong hast thou done me by dismissing me and by cruelly forbiding me by decree to appear in thy beauteous presense. I pray thee, sweet lady, to remember this poor enslaved heart, which for love of thee suffers so many pangs."

To such words he added a sequuence of other foolish notions all in the manner of those that his books had taught him, imitating their language as nearly as he could. ¹

Here, after his lady is insulted, Don Quixote charges, with his horse, the taunters. However, his decrepit horse falls and both he and the horse end up on the ground. The taunters escape. Don Quixote yells after them;

"Flee not, cowardly rabble! Wait, slavish herd! It is not my fault, but the fault of my horse, that I am stretched here." ²

As I said, I've just started reading it and it is very long, 1000 + pages.

¹Don Quixote, Miguel De Cervantes Saavedra, Signet Cassics®, February 2001, pg. 63
² Don Quixote, Miguel De Cervantes Saavedra, Signet Cassics®, February 2001, pg. 79

Posted: Thursday, July 15, 2010 with 277 comment(s).

Categories: Stories, Books, and Authors,

Tags: Don Quixote, Knights, Honor,

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