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Nearly Relevant
Nonsense, Fiction, and Miscellaneous Things

North Korean Update
      GRSJR Newswire - irst-person online shooter Kim Jung Un has taken the lead in the online shooter game Megalomania.  After 3 rounds of play, half his opponents vacated the game after receiving threats of nuclear warheads being aimed at their residences.  The remaining opponents responses have varied.

     Jim Smith, a player from the UnitedStates,sat at a game console chain-smoking and repeating,I don't believe it.  I just don't believe it.  I think the only weapons he has are an invisible sai and maybe - MAYBE - a couple of titanium bo staffs.  You can't tell me a player of martial arts heritage has access to nuclear weapons and expect me to believe it."

     Canadian Paul Lefebreve disagreed with Mr. Smith.  Although it isn't really within the games rules, I do believe Mr. Un has nuclear weapons. However, I don't believe he knows where I live nor that he even knows how to find out where I live, therefore I'm continuing in the game." 

     "New Zealander Harold Zoosh stated, " Well, I myself have 3 toilet clogging satellites orbiting in geosynchronous space.  At anytime, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, I could clog all of the toilets of Mr Un'sluxurious palace.  I've told him so, and I'm expecting a surrender any time now."

     In the plush library of his abode, we talked with international relations expert Raul Madriguez.  Mr. Madriguez said the 30 year old Mr. Un is likely to win Megalomania, but the risk is that he'll then confront neighboring countries who have somewhat more experienced leaders.  As we talked, toilet sewage began seeping
into Mr Madriguez's library.

     Harold Zoosh was last seen wearing night-vision goggles
while staring intently into his computer screen and oveheard saying, Ooops, missed."


Old Man
     Kids next door playing.

     One says braggingly, "I'm special!"  Other says, petulantly, "What?"

     Loads of fun.  Whatever happened to Cowboys and Indians? 

     Either I'm pedantic or society has become batty in it's 'reformativeness'.


ere are 2 of my preferred daydreams as to the type of life I THINK I'd like to live. 

     The first is not unrelated to the story 'The Rescue'.  I'd have a cheap premanufactured home - for example - constructed in the desert, preferably with the back of the home right up against some rock formation or small hill that was, regardless of it's smallness, still taller and more predominant than the home itself.  This would be a cozy sort of arrangement, not quite open to the point of being unprotected, but also not entirely isolated.

     The place would be distant from population, with a state  road 10 or 15 minutes from an interstate highwayWhich highway is then another 15 or 20 minutes from a mall with grocery store. 
I'd have internet service or TV .  An occasional rattlesnake or scorpion would be most of my company;  Except for a 'once-in-a-while' tourist who stops and wants to know what it's like to live in such a beautiful, secluded place.

     The second daydream is a little more problematic.  I'd be a lone sailor - doing all the navigating, maintenance, and other associated sailing junk myself - while sailing the world's seas.  I'd, preferably, go for a few months without seeing land or civilization, then occasionally come across a 1/4 mile or so diameter deserted island.  I'd pull in and berth, hang out on the island a few days or weeks or whatever I felt like, I'd gather coconuts and other supplies, while reacquainting myself with landlubber legs, then I'd set out for the ocean once again, happy as a lark.
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